I walk the darkened alleys alone but for my fears,
Condemned to live eternal night awash with unshed tears.
The wind pulls at my hair, the rain streams down my face,
My unvoiced cry echoes all around for everyone to hear.
Embittered shades of long dead friends emerge from every side,
Reminding me of buried dreams and hopes I’d though to hide.
I cast them out with words of hate,
My soul has long since died.
My firefall woman beckons me with promises of tomorrow,
A towering love of countless years yet lost in shadows of sorrow.
Tempting me to throw off my chains,
To embrace my past.
A past of glorious failure, of scorned chances,
Reduced to shards of fragmented glass,
Smashed on the rocks of my single minded pursuit of destruction.
Rejecting family and cutting ties,
With webs of deceit, falsehoods and lies.
It seemed so deliberate, this perverse quest,
To become what I most despised.
A decade of toxification,
Culminating in the alienation of all I longed for.
Revulsion, the on emotion conjured,
By this pitiful wretch.
Now she reaches, now she touches, now she strokes my hair,
But nothing moves me, for I know she doesn’t care.
Once I would have begged, prostrate upon the ground,
Before she let me slide down the slope of despair.
I walk away from the emotional maelstrom,
Leaving a withered husk in my wake.
Bereft of all feeling,
I walk alone with my regrets.
The shadows engulf me one final time,
Taking me in their cold, clammy grip,